I've been doing a lot of thinking lately...There have been people in my life that I thought were friends that turned out to be something else. They have been rude, hurtful, deceitful, and just plain ol' inconsiderate and I have always tried to "handle it like an adult" despite my straight forward way of thinking...But that stops here and now!
From now on, when someone hurts my feelings I'm going to let them know. I'm not going to dwell on something that someone says, I'm just going to deal with it right then and there and if they have a problem with it, then maybe we're just not supposed to be friends.
Those people who have said they never liked my husband (without thinking about my feelings), those who've treated us like we're second-rate family members, those who've said my first son would be a mistake (whether out of jealousy or not!) or called my husband while they were taking a bath and then lied to all our friends about my hubby or I cheated on each other, or those who've only been our friends when it was convenient for them...I have cut those people out of my life for good! For them to treat us like that, they must have never been true friends and those people they think are still their friends are only talking trash about them when they're not all together!
That's a world of drama and lies that my hubby and I decided we no longer want to be a part of...If it means leaving people behind, I guess it's for the best and we're not that important to them, or them to us.
Those people who've always been our friends will always be our friends...Those who've invited us to stay with them whenever we're in town because we've been made unwelcome somewhere else, or those who want to drive 5 hours just for Seb's birthday party, or those who've offered to watch Shan for me whenever I needed them, or the friends who've sent me recipes just because or given me a complement when I needed it the most, or the ones who've said straight forward is the best, or the friends who say they miss us...Those people are in my heart and my thoughts everyday! And, although we're making new friends here, our other great friends are only a road trip away!
So thank you...For being our friends, and in a way our family. I hope you know who you are and how important you are to us!
Blessings to you all!
New Assigments and Learning to Sail
2 years ago
4 comments:
Sometimes you sort out friends and aquaintances. It is easy to lump everyone into one group and that just simply isn't so.
There are people who I consider friends but not really good friends. Then there are people who I am friendly with but I would never do anything social with. Those would fall mainly in the aquaintance category. If I like to hang with them and they like to hang with me and I would be comfortable even sharing a secret or a personal story with them..definate friend. Then there are new friends that are exiting the aquaintance phase and entering the friend phase... then there are some who were in the friend phase and for whatever reason will no longer be "allowed" in that group...at least for the time being.
I have had the same such awakening recently myself. People who I thought were one way turned out to not be so...this even went the good way too...someone who I thought was against me...turns out they weren't.
Relationships are complicated. People that consistantly crap on you are not your friends but sometimes friends treat each other poorly without intent. Sometimes the best bet is to take a step back until you can see with a fresh pair of eyes. If you can talk to these people...you should tell them what they have done wrong to you or it will only fester and become something bigger.
I also know that sometimes it never repairs and sometimes you never look back when you leave.
GO with your heart. And I myself am beginning to think that surrounding yourself with people who lift you up most of the time is the way to go!
Well I know how that goes, I have also come to the conclusion that sometimes you just have to be blunt and draw the line particularly with in-laws in my case. Well I love ya lots and think your beautiful (have I made your husband jealous yet?) Sorry that it doesn't sound as if things have been going great, but they will get better.
Toodles
Oatmeal
I'm with you babe! I don't care to go to Bend again at all! I was there for 4 years and made hardly no TRUE friends! And I hate drama and people who talk behind your back! Life is short, to short for all that crap!! Good for you!
I agree that life is too short to mess around with folks that mess you around, just make sure you're not mixing messages before you give someone the boot. I've ended up in some pretty big snarls with people over what turned out to be a silly misunderstanding. I'm a big believer in the idea that there are no perfect people, only perfect intentions. I try to be more forgiving of the silly stuff that people do without thinking and ignore a lot of it too. However, there is no excuse for someone setting out to hurt you or cutting you down behind your back. I hope the circle of friends in your future is true to themselves and true to you.
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